Friday, October 10, 2008

Why is Space Patrol the best show ever?

1) The dancing!

After a hard mission shooting aliens, the cast return to their undersea casino base, where they discuss stuff while in the background, there's Space Dancing of the first water. These are important scenes where the plot is explained - but no-one gives a shit, not with THAT going on in the background. As a result, no-one knows what's going on in Space Patrol.

2) The wigs!

None of the female hair in Space Patrol moves. The ship can be falling apart but the hair remains rock steady. In the future, all the women are fabulous and all the men have gone to seed. Years later, Blake's 7 would steal this, and base every set design on a hairdressing salon called Twists of Woking.

3) The music!

Imagine Burt Bacharach had done the music for Star Trek. And you're not even close to the jazz madness. German DJs are obsessed by doing remixes of it to this very day. Here's footage from a 1996 rave. With gogo dancers. Yes.

And here's a fucked-up 70s rock version from the German version of The Old Grey Whistle Test:

4) The sets!

It's very odd watching TV Sci Fi from the 60s that has had money smeared over it. It looks fantastic. Okay, so the navigation computer is (literally) an iron. But apart from that.

5) Robots that look like this


6) It's in German.
German television only made one science fiction series. This. It lasted half a dozen episodes. And not only is it deeply lovely, but it's so incredibly obscure it can only endear you to people. I'm off to a wedding at the weekend and I am fucking telling everyone I meet about it. Especially if they're called Janet/Terry and work in teaching/accounting or just mention mortgages/compulsory Latin.


GalFord said...

The SpaceDancing scares me... not because of the random movements, but because it's like a futuristic version of LineDancing/Parapara!

The mind boggles!

Perry Neeham said...

I wish I could introduce you to my long term fuckbuddy David. Lovely bloke, but has a major weakness for media tat (and a very impressive recovery time).