School of Rock

Went to see this with the lovely, cultured Ben. He's writing a biography of Orson Welles, and knows the difference between Sashimi and Sushi.

The film itself is a *lot* better than you'd expect - mainly cos it's written by the man behind the unsettling Chuck and Buck. It's an equally squirmy film. And yet, it's also like Sister Act. It's a finely tuned balance.

And, as it's that edgy, features a very gay 10 year old stylist.

The thing, however, that troubled Ben and me was Freddy, the drummer. He was... well... Anyway, both of us found ourselves standing outside the cinema wracked with middle-class gay angst.

Our problem was this: How do you describe a handsome 10 year old without sounding like a paedo?

You see? You shuddered a bit reading that last sentence.

It's a weird issue. Neither of us actually fancied him - we were just both aware that in about eight years time he'd be really rather something. And both of us found ourselves squirming over our premature gaydar firing off. Pretty pre-teens are like pretty Tory MPs - not something you want to be aware of.

We eventually settled on the phrase: "One day, that boy's going to break a lot of hearts."

***

In a similar vein, Ann's boyfriend described Germaine Greer's "THE BOY" as "Ginny's wank book".