Friday, December 12, 2003

Sex survey

Everywhere, we are being counted by little men in coats with clipboards.
I'm used to going into a club, and a man the size of an expensive Smeg Fridge noting this fact with a counter...


...I cycle into work, and a student on a stool makes a tick as I whizz past the Euston Road.
...I take the tube, and a beardie's clocking me as I struggle past the clipboards.
...I walk to the Chinese for lunch, and a pasty-faced starveling notes this fact grimly (First observed by Richard Herring )

... And where, you may wonder, will the "Let's Count People Doing Things" madness stop?

Well, I shall tell you:

There I was last night, cruising the Hyde Park Rose Garden, for a bush trembler on the way home... and there they were! Men! With Clipboards! Counting!

One wonders what the boxes were that they were ticking...

- Dissapointed loners with combovers and tesco bags (12)
- Noisy old men (6)
- Really very cold but quite cute foreigners (2)
- Weird snogging couple on a bench (1)
- Tramp or Trade, hard to tell (3)
- Mad moppet looking for his "boyfriend" who he'd met for the first time there last night (1)
- Cute film runner called Jamie (1)

I had the cute one. It's always nice to shag someone with a name a bit like your own. And my inner Who fan was thrilled that I got to shout out "Jamie! Jamie! Hold On!". Twice.

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