It's all gone wrong.
Not only was lovely Byron too hungover to come round on Saturday, but, worst... I've lost my mobile phone on the road home last night, so my Big List Of Men is lying crushed underneath a really big truck in Holborn.
I've spent the day using my investigative skills to track down the men that matter. It's not looking good - even with my attention to small talk, I've only really got a clutch of first names and a vague memory of jobs to go on.
How am I ever going to hunt down the lovely Byron? And what about the luscious Adam.
I know he's deputy manager of the Four Seasons in Witney. But I also know his boyfriend is the other deputy manager.
So far, I've hunted down cute Bradley, to his Ladies Accessories department store head office. Is very sweet - got through to his secretary who told me "Oh, he's in handbags at the moment..."