So it's 8am, I'm at the gym, hungover and trying not to throw up over my personal trainer. And then I realise that Breakfast Television is somehow wrong. Everyone is wearing sweaters, they've even got the old clock back. And suddenly the world seemed a little better.
"Anyway," said my trainer, "My idea is for a book about super intelligent mutant cows. See - mankind advanced because of oppposable thumbs. So, I'm thinking opposable hooves. And guns. They get really big guns. But they get taken down in the end - cos some good cows from India come over and stop them. My girlfriend likes it."
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