I am out for drinks with one of the Steves. A guy sits down at our table.
"You want to buy?" he asks.
Steve looks at him, surprised. "I don't want any DVDs," he explains.
The guy places a plastic bag on the table (a Woolworths bag!) and starts to unwrap another bag inside it.
"It's a t-shirt," he explains, "Good t-shirt." He rifles around some more.
"No thank you," I say, and look away. He's boring me and my Inner Daily Mail reader has taken over. Just look away, Jeremy, look away, and maybe the ghastly man will disappear.
"Please," the man urges, reaching further down into the endless plastic bags, "I'm starving."
"No," says Steve politely.
The man stands up and shakes his head sadly. Then he leaves the bar.
"That was odd," said Steve. "He said he was starving, but he's got a really nice bike."
"Yeah," I agreed, "And he didn't even work the rest of the bar. Just sat down here. And what was with all those plastic bags? Especially ones from Woollies?"
"Some people," we agree.
An hour later we realise the guy has stolen Steve's wallet and mobile from the top of the table.