Not all cats like marmite.
Not all boys like Kylie.
Quorn sausages taste just as bad as real ones.
The men you want to call seldom do.
I can't digest Magnums.
Straight couples get engaged in heatwaves.
I appear to earn too much money.
While you can't buy happiness, you can buy DVDs.
All publicists are evil hell demons who will die alone and hated by their children. Even the maggots consuming their rotting flesh wil shudder with revulsion.
Peppermint tea is scrummy.