In a nutshell: Don't let a career-mincing bitch ruin your life.
Which is all very well, but it took ages to say it, in endless lovely frocks in unending gorgeous rooms. Veerrrrrry sloooowly.
And was David Walliams playing... Satan? or Billy Bunter? It's hard to tell. But any trace of atmosphere is instantly dissipated when he looms over Maggie Smith and intones "Silly girl. You silly girl."
Gareth McClean's review