Tuesday, November 27, 2007

The Root of the Problem

"So," says my dentist, "What made you wait 10 days before seeing me?"

"Wikipedia," I mumble.

She looks like she's about to say something, but instead just prods away at my gum. Eventually she sighs.

"You'll have to take some antibiotics before I can get to it. It's an idea to avoid alcohol." She sees the look in my eyes and barely pauses. "No, really. It'll make you very, very sick. Everywhere."

So. A week without booze. I can do this. I've done it before. There was a period of two years when I was dry, smug, and wafer thin.

But this is different. I've a week before I see her again, and in the meantime I can't really do the following...
  • drink
  • eat
  • sleep
  • have sex


Hmmn. This leaves me with smoking and TV. Oh and the gym. Oh dear.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yes, but just think, in that one week, you'll achieve even more than you did during that period on the wonder fatloss drugs. And without the mood swings.

Or not.

Hugh said...

are you on metronidazole then?

I'd also recommend, you giving up smoking too - it delays the healing process,
But on the old Risk Vs Benefit malarkey, taking away all your vices may just be too cruel

Skip said...

Spot on hugh! That's exactly the beast. I fear it may be like Ipecac.

I managed to get through one night without booze. Although by the time I'd consumed a cocktail of antibiotics, codeine, sleeping tablets and a Wes Anderson movie, I was as high as a flaming kite.

I tried smoking. But fell asleep halfway through my second cigarette. Something which I found hysterically funny.

Sheesh. A week of this and i'll be one of those buggers who is just "high on life". Arsewits.

Hugh said...

oh i'm emotionally scarred by Ipecac - i once gave it to a child who came to A&E, they'd swallowed some tablet or other.
After taking it, the child carried on playing, and then, that moment came, it looked at me as if to say, "what have you done".... and then.....not quite sure how to type the noise, but you get the message, but the entire contents appeared on the floor....

I never gave that drug again

Metronidazole roughly has the same effect with alcohol, your dentist wasn't lying... though she maybe when she says
"small scratch coming up" or "you won't feel this"

good luck

Perry Neeham said...

Think hedgehog and hibernate. There is a joke there about pricks if anyone can be bothered.

Skip said...

It's going to be torture. There's a half-open bottle of rose in the fridge that goes tinkle-tinkle whenever I reach for a yoghurt.

Perhaps it'll be just like wine-tasting - I'll just drag a bucket into the living room.