Sunday, February 25, 2007

Cat food advert

There's an astonishing advert where A Desperate Single Woman gives up and gets a cat. "It was love at first sight," she gushes. "Frankie gave me a look of such love."

A cat? Love? Oh dear.

The advert finishes with the cat coming into her room in the morning, and Singleton announcing, "I don't know where I'd be without my furry alarm clock."


Ann said...

That's nothing. "That's Life" magazine had an article about a woman who prostituted herself for catfood. "Patricia had nine hungry pussies to feed and only one thing to sell..."

" day, while mixing a jar of salmon paste with my last four slices of break - a paltry feast for nine yowling cats - I broke down.

'I'm going to lose you,' I wept. 'You'll be taken away because I can't feed you.'"

She then meets ex-boyfriend Dave, who jokingly suggests she sell her body.

"'I'm not that desperate' I replied crisply.

Then something inside me cracked. Not desperate? I thought of the empty cupboard where pet food should be...

'How many tins would we be talking about?' I croaked.

Dave's eyes stretched in shock. 'Um...10. No, 12!' he replied.
I nodded. 'But not here,' I said."

There's lots more.

Skip said...

That is, of course, complete madness. And yet, utter brilliance.

What does one have to do to get a tin of that special cat pate?

Matt said...

It's a lot worse... "I can't get up without my furry alarm clock"

The whole advert puts me in mind of the Smack the Pony sketch "Cats - for when you just can't get a man" and the cat and woman snort coke together, take a bath together and then a paw puts the bedside light out...

Skip said...

My god. How brilliant is that?