Well, that was January

And it wasn't quite the month I was expecting

• Spent the month on the sofa and lost weight! - thanks to a fabulous array of illnesses. My book Cough your way to a six pack available soon.
  
• Nearly had a boyfriend - which was a bemusing diversion.
  
• Watched all of new "Marple" - So grippingly bad it gets ironic quotes.
  
• Didn't even give up smoking - Okay, so there were a couple of weeks when I didn't smoke, but that's only cos I couldn't breathe.
  
• Got into Corrie - But only for mad-eyed Tracey Barlow. So loony and scheming, if she was a gay man, I'd date her.
  
• Have rationalised my drink problem - After all, if it's only vodka, and I can remember getting home every night, it can't be that bad.
  
• Gone off Vanity Fair - Honestly, the last couple of issues have been really bland, something I never thought I'd accuse VF of. And the freebies have been dissappointing. I want a glow-in-the-dark Dominick Dunne. Or Scratch-n-Sniff Republicans.
  
• Gone off the Saturday Guardian - It's like they did a survey and removed all of the bits I liked. There are but three things left - and i'm not naming them in case something bad happens.
  
• Been to London once - Marvellous as my Cardiff friends are, there's something so familiar and nice about passing out in my London flat, with its slight smell of damp and bleach.