Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Online shopping again

The internet was invented so that men could lie to get sex.

I've not ordered from gaydar since a man with a surprise combover turned up on my doorstep. However, I've reactivated my profile recently - now I'm moving to Wales, it may be the only way to avoid celibacy.

Oddly, gaydarwise, Cardiff is a little disappointing. We like rugby players. They're nice - but gaydar appears to just be offering men who stopped playing rugby years ago, but still eat as though they do.

Adam suggested I try out a different site "". It's a different world. Whereas Gaydar is rebranding slightly as the McD of online shagging, fitlads appears to be run by a couple of blokes, and has a sign-up process that includes the immortal phrase: "Oi! Ladies, this site is only for blokes. Stop signing up to have a peek at chav cock."

Most of the profiles appear to have been written in a hurry on a mobile phone at a bus stop. They're remarkably blunt, full of promise, but lacking in punctuation.

Despite the different approach, it's fundamentally the same. It's one thing to look at men through a glass darkly, but face to face, it's all too easy to think; "You're really not 33, the only bit of you that's 'defined' is your pot belly, and, er, no way are you drinking my piss..."

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